Ranma: A new Ending
by SuperLardBucket
Summary: Distraught by the failed wedding, Ranma realizes that all of his life's problems are caused by fighting. So, he decides to become a pacifist! But he couldn't have picked a worse time, as the demon king Noboru has come to Japan, seeking Ranma's head.
1. I'm Done

**Ranma ½: A New Ending**

**Disclaimer: Ranma ½ is owned by Rumiko Takahashi. Ranma ½ is a fan-fiction/parody and nothing more, so please support the official release. Since I don't feel like typing this 100 times, the phrase "Holy Freaking Douche Babies" will represent it in future chapters**

**Summary: I love Ranma 1/2. I really do. That said, I dislike the ending. It was too open-ended for my tastes. Too much was left to the imagination and too little was actually satisfyingly concluded. So, I thought I'd write a Ranma story arc to follow the last one, which will hopefully have an ending I can enjoy and one others can enjoy too. If you saw this story before, you'll know that this summary was changed from how it was before. Before, I was really being an asshole about what I was doing. My intentions probably came off as douche-bag-ish to people. I really can't excuse it. All I can say is that I was a different person back then, but I recently changed for the better, and that I hope that you, the Ranma characters, and Rumiko Takahashi can accept my most heartfelt apologies.****Chapter 1: "I'm Done…"**

It was calm… It was calm to the point that one could even say peaceful… And this scared the people of Nerima to death. You'd be scared too, if it was so dang peaceful in a place where giant tornados of death coming out of nowhere, massive, destructive chi explosions destroying property value, and animals and women standing where man once did a few seconds after a slight drizzle was the norm. People had gotten used to disasters and mayhem controlling their existences in what seemed to be the focal point for all insanity in Japan.

And therein laid the problem. It was calm, peaceful, tranquil. No monsters were destroying the city, no perverted lechers were running around stealing women's unmentionables, and no one was trying to kill someone, cast a spell on someone, force someone into marriage, or any combination of the three.

And yet for the Tendo and Saotome families, this was not the least bit surprising. The reason was that yesterday, our hero Ranma Saotome was supposed to finally marry Akane Tendo, his 3-year betrothed, and since the majority of the nut-jobs in Nerima loved one, hated one, or both, the fact that the wedding did not go so well is a given.

Now, when Ranma Saotome is involved, you can often count on the impossible, the improbable, and the down-right illogical to happen. After all, a martial artist cursed by the pools of Jusenkyo to turn into a girl when splashed with cold water and a boy when splashed with hot, who had 3 constantly bickering fiancées, a crazy stalker for each gender, and more enemies than an entire football stadium of people could count on their hands and toes, can obviously stir up trouble. But he can often handle himself against them. He can usually defuse the situation and the unstable maniacs involved before any real damage ensued.

I guess he just wasn't used to all of them showing up at once.

His two other martial-artist fiancées Ukyo and Shampoo, the perverted master Happosai, the near-sighted blunder Mousse, the ever-lost rival Ryoga, "The Black Rose" Kodachi (aka just about the most insane woman on the face of the Earth), and Tatewaki Kuno, "The Blue Thunder" and about the densest, dumbest jackass on the face of the Earth all came with the intention of ruining this wedding for some reason or another

The floor board creaked as Ranma sat up from his futon. He noticed his dad was already gone and stretched his joints, which ached in furious pain, reminding him of the fiasco of yesterday. The poor boy gave a sigh of defeat. For the past 3 years, he'd been beating these people senseless, often to defend Akane, and he'd never let it get to him. He'd always held the same air of confidence, the same air of power. He had stood tall and proud against the indomitable odds life threw at him, which he always seemed to dominate. Hell, his last battle had pitted him against an immortal: The Phoenix King Saffron, and he'd still won and saved Akane's life.

But something about the wedding was different. Ranma contemplated as to why it was different as he slowly limped his way to the shower he so desperately needed. It's not like he hadn't lost battles before. He lost battles all the time. But Ranma had always rebounded immediately. He had always gotten back on his feet, mastered a powerful, new technique in record time, and whooped whoever it was what whooped him (A/N: I've been reading a new book called "All Over but the Shoutin'" and the author, like me, has a Southern way of speaking, which he used in his book for a truly powerful effect, so I thought I'd see if putting some of the Southern phrases I use from time to time in my writing to see if it adds the same effect. I highly recommend the book.) However, Ranma was learning no new secret technique. He was not getting back on his feet. For the first time in Ranma's life, he was admitting defeat.

Maybe it was just how long it had been going on. Ranma loved kicking ass as much as the next guy, but 3 years of having to deal with the same people with the same motives and the same threats was tiring. It seemed to never end. Or maybe it was because he'd really thought this would be the end. After all, most of these people attacked Ranma out of being in love with Ranma, Akane, and/or someone in love with Ranma and/or Akane.

As Ranma sunk into the tub (He'd since decided a bath would be easier on his nerves) he could feel the heat loosen his muscles and soothe his aching pains. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, sinking into the soapy water. As he blew bubbles of relief, he turned and heard "Akane! Nabiki! Father! Ranma! Mr. Saotome! Breakfast is ready." shouted by the eldest Tendo daughter: Kasumi. He didn't care. He needed this bath, and he knew Akane would probably understand and save him some breakfast.

'_Akane… maybe that's why…'_ Ranma thought to himself. Perhaps it wasn't the disaster of the wedding bothering him, it was the wedding not taking place. Ever since learning that their fathers had agreed Ranma and Akane would marry each other, without their consent, without even meeting each other, the two had been like cats and dogs Ranma was the dog of course. Ever since his father threw Ranma into a cellar full of cats, while he was covered in cat-nip, at a young age (to learn some martial arts technique or another) Ranma had been scared of cats, but I digress. The two had been fighting constantly, and after the Saffron battle, Ranma was finally able to admit to Akane, and to himself, that he loved her. Not only that, but she reciprocated his feelings, at least as far as Ranma could tell, women being mysterious creatures and all that.

Ranma had known that a long, awkward conversation follows that kind of confession, and men just do not like to talk about their feelings. The wedding offered a way around the long, awkward conversation straight to a happy life with his loving wife, but more than that, offered a way to finally be with Akane. That was beyond disappointing. Words don't describe that kind of feeling.

And then it hit him. The wedding hadn't been ruined because all of those people showed up. It had been ruined becuase he had fought all of those people at the wedding. In fact, all of his problems, from his aqua-transgenderal state, to his many fiancees, to his many rivals, all stemmed from his inability to go 5 minutes without hitting someone. If Ranma didn't fight so much, he wouldn't have beaten up Kuno, he wouldn't have gotten Shampoo's kiss of death, he wouldn't have been fighting Ukyo long enough for her to realize he and Akane fought so much, he wouldn't have made an enemy of Ryoga or Mousse, and he wouldn't have fallen into a cursed spring.

Buddha did say that the path to enlightenment was non-violence...

So with a weary resignation, Ranma drew his head back and gave a long sigh. He was tired. He was broken. He was done. He would no longer fight. He would give up, simple as that. He'd already taken much more than any person should and he refused to take it anymore. Rather than meet the many boulders life threw at him constantly head-on, he would merely sit and allow them to flow beyond him. He would still train, to stay in shape, but he'd do a few less sit-ups and watch a few more movies; throw a few less kicks and spend a few more minutes with Akane. And most of all, he was done fighting monsters, done beating bad guys, and done being the hero. Someone else could deal with them all. Ranma was just going to sit back and relax. He would be a regular pacifist. You could pass him off as a monk.

Yes, it all seemed like the perfect plan to Ranma, but Ranma didn't realize a few things. Being a hero's a funny thing, especially being the hero in a comedy/action manga. You can fight it all you want, but it's in your blood. It's who you are. And if you try to escape that destiny, then you're starin' down the barrel of a big ol' "Whoop-ass '89" gun, with life fingering the trigger, trying to decide who it should fill full o' lead first to get you to realize that you gotta do what you gotta do.

And the bullet in this Whoop-ass '89 was a real doozy.

_Well, that's the first chapter. They will get funnier after this; I just wanted to set the story and all. Next time, The King of Demons comes to Tokyo and even the mighty Happosai is brought to his knees. With Ranma complacent, who can stop this might beast? Until next time, take care, and God bless you all._


	2. Ultimate Power! Enter the king of Demons

**Chapter 2: Ultimate Power! Enter the King of Demons.**

**Disclaimer: Holy Freaking Douche Babies**

**Okay, before I begin, I want to settle something. I'm not dissing Rumiko Takahashi. I love Rumiko Takahashi. She's one of my favorite manga writers of all time (even if Inuyasha was a giant power drill in my skull) I am merely remarking on the fact that most of her work, as far as I have seen, has had endings that weren't very fulfilling for me. Inuyasha never ended at all and left such a bad taste in my mouth that even when I went to read the supposedly better manga, I couldn't get through it. Ranma's ending was going very well right up until that very last page. It seemed rushed, inconclusive, and all-around unfulfilling. I'm not saying I'm a better writer than Rumiko Takahashi. I'm just saying that I didn't particularly care for her ending and I am going to make one that feels a bit more right to me and see if I can entertain some other people with it. With that out of the way, stop your bitching and read the damn fanfiction.**

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Nerima's residents finally managed to calm down. Peace had returned to their quiet streets. By which I mean chaos resumed, so it was business as usual. The cries of frightened women began in a small point on one side of the neighborhood and gradually spread out to the other side like a wave. Leading this wave was a little short blob leaping from rooftop to rooftop, carrying his illicit goods.

Unphased by all of the excitement yesterday, Happosai was back to his old tricks of relieving women of their undergarments. One had to wonder why they were still hanging them outside to dry, knowing the fate that, more likely than not, awaited them. As he flew through the air, carrying a bag of undies bigger than himself, he shouted in delight, "AH HA HA!!! PANTIES!!! PANTIES!!! Oh what a haul! Curious though, normally Ranma would've shown up to ruin my fun by now. Oh well! More spoils to be had! AH HA HA!!!"

Having garnered enough garments to satisfy his lust (for about five minutes) the perverted old master jumped down to the streets and began running home. He was stopped, however, when he rounded a corner and bumped into a tall, mysterious, cloaked figure. "Hey! Watch where you're going!" the old master screamed, frantically trying to recover the spoils he had dropped. The figure remained silent, opening his mouth only to say, "Saotome…"

"What? Oh, you must mean Ranma. He's at the Tendo dojo. 5 blocks down and to the left. Can't miss it." The grandmaster replied, stuffing his treasures back into his sack. "Show me…" the figure commanded ominously. "Eh, sorry, I got a lot more to do today. Places to go, people to see, panties to rub." "I wasn't asking…"

At that, the figure waved his hand, causing Happosai's bag of wonder to burst into flames. Happosai was terribly quiet for a few seconds, before his rage poured out, revealing a massive battle aura. "You're going to regret that…"

A few minutes later, Ranma was out of his bath. His joints and bones still ached, but he felt a bit better, if not a tad melancholy. The once familiar dojo had been decimated by the failed wedding. Ranma carefully made his way around pit-holes and rafters sticking out of the ceiling, walls, and floor.

As he descended the stairs, he took notice of the state of his "family". Genma was crying and mumbling about dojos and training and what-not. His old friend Soun was clinging to a rafter that had come clean off and crying in the fetal position. Kasumi was, as always, happy, cheerful, and completely unphased by the insanity around her. Nabiki was furiously calculating all the money she had lost off of bets over the wedding. It seems she was a true believer in Ranma and Akane's love (and always willing to take a risk) and that she had made bets with 1000 kids, each that Ranma and Akane would go through with it. Akane was the only one having a sane reaction to the travesty, as she sat at the table, trying desperately to hold in the tears. When she saw Ranma, she cast him a weak, but sincere, smile. Ranma, however, could see the pain behind her eyes.

Sitting up and speaking with dignity (or at least as much dignity as one can speak with after clinging to a piece of wood and crying in the fetal position) Soun addressed the family. "Very well, let's see about fixing this dojo. Any ideas?" "I think Ranma should pay for it…" Nabiki droned, "It's all his fault". "What are you talking about!?!" he protested. "You're the one who invited EVERY NUTJOB IN ALL OF JAPAN!!!" "Yes, but you're the one who made them angry," she replied.

"I have a plan!" Genma announced, holding up a poster. "There's a martial arts tournament, with a prize big enough to pay for all of the repairs, with a little left over. Ranma can enter the tournament and win it for us!" "Do it yourself you selfish bastard!" Ranma replied. "How can you speak that way to your own father!?!" Genma shouted. "I raised you!" "Don't remind me!" the young man replied.

"Anyway, I'm done with fighting," Ranma finally said, after a long staring contest with his father. "What!?!" the whole table shouted. "What?" the boy asked in response.

"Ranma… you're Ranma…" Akane said, trying to explain.

"Yeah, so?"

"So, fighting's kind of your thing…"

"Not anymore… I'm done… I'm tired of all this crap… You know what's happened to me because of fighting? I'm a transgender! I get attacked every other day of the week! I have 3 crazy fiancées and someone trying to rape me for each gender! So I'm done. Ranma Saotome is bowing out!"

"But what if someone challenges you to a fight!?!"

"Then they'll have to make new plans…"

"What if I get kidnapped again?"

"I'm not the only one here who can go save you…"

"What about-"

"Look Akane, get this through your thick, macho head. I'm! Done! Fighting!"

Normally, it would be at this point that Ranma would find himself getting very familiar with a mallet. It was strange then, that Akane did not whack him, but merely started walking out of the room. As she left, she turned and muttered "Ranma no baka…" "What's her problem?" he asked the others. "Ranma…" Nabiki began, "you're an idiot…"

A week passed, and somehow the family had gotten the money to repair the house (I suspect prostitution and/or loaning Genma to a local zoo). Still, there was an air of tension throughout the house. Without Ranma fighting anymore, the residents of the dojo had begun to grow weary. Only when he stopped fighting did they realize how much they depended on him. Without Ranma to beat up the repo men, they had to actually start paying the bills. Without Ranma to beat up Kuno, the blue blunder started popping up more and more to harass Akane (and give contact harassment to the rest of the house.) Without Ranma to beat up those idiots at Cartoon Network, Toonami got cancelled and replaced by some bastardized version with action movies that had all the actual action edited out, meaning the Naruto filler would take even longer to end.

The air of tension was cut, however, with a metaphorical knife in the form of a knock on the door. "Akane!!! I got your letter! I got here as soon as I could!!!" the knocker screamed as the aforementioned girl opened the door. "Ryoga, I handed that letter to you a week ago asking you to come by later that day… and you were 5 feet from the door…" "I got a little lost, but I'm here."

With a weary sigh, Akane let the eternally lost martial artist in. "Thanks for coming…" "No problem. Is it true?" the boy whispered to his secret admiree. "Yes," she replied, "Ranma really has given up fighting. He didn't even fight you-know-who when he burst through the wall and started molesting me." "Who?" Ryoga asked. "You can't say his name, or he'll show up." She answered.

As if he magically knew they were talking about him, Kuno burst through the wall. "Did I hear someone call for the Blue Thunder!?!" "No Kuno!" Akane shouted. "Oh Akane Tendo, abandoned by that dog Saotome! Here! Let me clench you to my bosom!" Kuno screamed as he proceeded to molest Akane. "You don't have a bosom Kuno… get… off…" she muttered angrily.

At that moment, Ranma walked by. Observing the scene, he disinterestedly droned, "Hey Ryoga. Hey Akane. Hey Upperclassman Kuno…" "Hello, Saotome…" Kuno replied cheerily, still grasping Akane. "Will you… GET OFF!!!" the young Tendo girl screamed, letting forth her legendary temper in the form of a kick that sent Kuno flying.

As Ranma walked off, Ryoga whispered to Akane, "It's even worse than you said… Hang on; I'll have Ranma back to his old self in no time." "Thanks Ryoga, you really are a sweetheart. I don't know what Ranma would do without you." Akane replied sweetly, taking her friend in a completely platonic hug. _'I will never forget this day… as long as I live…'_ Ryoga thought, deep in bliss.

After collecting himself, Ryoga made his way over to his friend and rival. "Hey Jerk…" "Hey…" Ranma replied, ignoring the insult.

"So, uh… Akane tells me you're not fighting anymore…"

"Yep…"

"Why…?"

"Because it's not worth it. All fighting ever does is make more problems for me…"

"Damn it Ranma! What the hell's wrong with you!?!"

"What do you mean?"

"You're so out of character! You've given up on fighting! You don't care when Kuno molests Akane! You've lost all passion for anything! It's like you're in a bad fanfiction or something."

At that, a strange laughter erupted out of nowhere, dying down after a few seconds.

"That was weird…"

"Don't change the subject…"

"Look, I'm just tired of dealing with all the crap, okay? I've had to deal with more shit than anyone should. Sue me for being tired of it! You know what!?! The universe wins! I don't wanna play anymore! The game's not fun! It never was! I'm done. Thanks for all the laughs; have a good one."

"Ranma! You make me sick! You never gave up on anything in your entire life! You're a pathetic shell of your former self!"

"Oh, speaking of shells, I'm hungry. Who's up for seafood?"

Before Ryoga could yell at Ranma more, a withered old husk floated in through the window. It began coughing, which caused the smoke it was covered in to fly all throughout the room. "It's Happosai!" Akane shouted. "He's… *cough*… he's coming… for you…" was all that the old lecher managed to squeeze out before fainting.

"Okay, so my vote's for seafood. What do you want Akane?"

_Wow… creepy… That's chapter 2, take it for what it is. Next time, the Demon King Noboru makes his presence known. His demand? The head of Ranma Saotome, with or without the body. Ranma's friends rush in to defend their friend, but Ranma still doesn't care. Can Akane convince him to go back to his rude, overconfident old self in time to save the day, or will the Demon King's evil plan come to fruition. Find out next time! Until then, take care and God bless you all._

_Oh noes! Zordon's tube-thing has been destroyed by the evil Evan Splooge. But Hark! A button that says "Review." Click it to summon the Super Freaking' Parody Rangers to save the day, and write your opinion of this chapter to give them the strength to defeat Splooge._


	3. The Demon King Noboru

**Chapter 3: The Demon King Noboru**

**Wow… I am just… so sorry… for anyone who's been waiting on this. I have just had so much shit going on… I just got out of school, I've been training to compete in Martial Arts Tournaments, I've been writing an actual book (As in one I might get actual money for…) Just all of that… made me forget I even write fanfiction… I am just… so sorry…**

**At any rate, here's the next chapter. I'm typing this before I write it, so I'm just going to say that I really hope it turns out well, partially to make up for the long wait and partially because I feel like the story thus far has not been my best work (I haven't made it as funny as most of my fics, and I don't feel as though I have accurately captured the Ranma mystique and experience), and I owe a lot more than that to you, to Rumiko Takahashi, who owns all this crap and not I, to the characters of the Ranma universe, who have brought me so much joy, and to myself. So, without further ado, I present chapter 3 of my Ranma story.**

Happosai laid upon the Tendo couch, writhing in pain as Kasumi tended to his injuries. Akane couldn't bear to look at the old man like this. Granted, her memories of him were not… fond ones… but to see him like this was just pathetic. The old man, once filled with such pride and energy (and perversion) was now a shell of his former self. True, he'd had the crap beaten out of him time and time again, but this was different. This was the first time he'd faced anyone in an actual martial arts battle and been completely beaten. It seems his pride was even more fragile than Ranma

Speaking of Ranma, the boy sat at the kitchen table, looking at the perverted master out of the corner of his eye, trying to focus as much as he could on his seafood. The truth was he still wanted to fight. It was just who he was. He was born a martial artist and all he ever knew was fighting, and this only added fire to the flames. His desire to avenge his grandmaster and friend (As a character in a very similar manga once said "A horrible friend is still a friend") and the excitement of fighting someone stronger than Happosai were almost too much to bear. But in the end, he knew it was best to stay out of it. All fighting ever did for him was create more problems. So, no matter how much he may want to beat this guy (or sock Kuno for molesting Akane) he knew it was best to stay out of it.

"Master, who did this to you?" Genma asked, concerned that whoever beat up Happosai may very well be after him.

Happosai folded his arms and assumed a very grim expression. "It was none other than… Noboru…"

"… Who's Noboru?" Soun asked.

"Didn't you kids ever listen to me when I was training you!?!" Happosai shouted in anger.

"We tried, but we were too tired from getting beaten up after stealing panties for you…" Genma explained.

"Noboru is the King of Demons. He's the most vile, despicable, evil force in the entire universe…"

"I thought that was you old perv…" Ranma interjected.

Happosai didn't even bat an eyelash at the insult. "This is no time for jokes Ranma. Noboru came to me looking for you…"

Akane's eyes widened. "He wants Ranma? Why?"

"He says he wants vengeance on Ranma for something. What it is, I'm not sure, but I do know that he's out to kill Ranma," Happy explained.

"Ranma what did you do now?" Nabiki asked, irritated at yet another problem that probably had little potential for profit.

"Like I know. Haven't you people figured out that I never actually know what the Hell I've done?" Ranma shouted in retaliation, quickly losing his temper. He was already stressed enough from ass-kicking withdrawal. He didn't need this.

Happosai breathed deeply. "Well, whatever it is, you'd better remember fast. Hopefully you can find a way to apologize before he guts you alive."

Ryoga, for one, had had enough. "Old man, I don't think you need to worry about Ranma. After all, he beat that Saffron guy didn't he? And he was immortal. And it wouldn't be the first time he's tangled with demons. Besides, if anyone's going to crush Saotome's skull, it's going to be me…"

Why could these people not learn? "Ryoga, I ain't fighting anyone. I've given up fighting. Remember?"

"Ranma, this is no time to become a pacifist!" Happosai shouted. "If you don't beat Noboru, or find some way to ease his anger, which I doubt you can, he'll just keep picking off your friends."

"In case you haven't noticed, old freak, my friends ain't exactly average people. One can fire energy blasts out of his hands, one can send a grown man flying with a hammer she pulls out of nowhere, one has a gigantic razor sharp spatula, one has a 300 year old ghoul as a bodyguard, and one carries weapons around in his shirt. I think they can handle themselves…"

"What about Kuno?" Akane asked

"Kuno's pretty much screwed…" Ranma replied.

"Oh Akane Tendo," quothe the aforementioned idiot, who appeared suddenly, arms tight around her waist, "Fear not for me, as the Vile Saotome underestimates the power of the great Tatewaki Kuno. No harm may come to me, so long as I gain strength from having you in my heart"

Needless to say, Akane sent Kuno flying very quickly. "Oh, harm will come to you alright…" she muttered angrily.

"Is there anything you need grandfather Happosai?" Kasumi asked, delicately rubbing the old man's head. He pulled the blanket over his head, and turned to the side.

"Please… just leave me alone… I've tried to run from it for so long, but it seems that it finally happened. Time has passed me by… I had a good long run, but in the end, the older generation must step aside and allow the younger one to take its place… I've carved many tunnels, and all I can hope is that those who come after me choose the better ones I dug to go down…"

"Happosai…" Akane muttered.

"Don't pity me child… It's a day I knew would come. I've lived a long life, and done terrible things. I have no illusion about what awaits me. A lifetime of hedonism must be answered with an eternity of despair in the afterlife..."

Akane had never seen this side of the old man. A tear welled up in his eye. It wasn't the kind he used when he feigned innocence. It was a genuine tear of sadness, and maybe even regret. Underneath all the evil and lust, Happosai really was a human being with emotions like all the rest. He wasn't a monster so full of itself that it did whatever it pleased. He was a man who'd given into his vices for so long, he knew that the afterlife fast approaching him was not a pleasant one, and who felt as though he could not possibly atone, and so sought comfort within those vices, as they were all he'd ever known.

An endless cycle of self-loathing.

"Is there anything I can do for you Grandfather Happosai?" She asked, taking him by the hand. He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time. He did not undress her with his eyes or plan some horrible fate for her. He simply looked into her eyes, and made contact with her soul.

"Well, you could let me have a good cry in your bosom…"

No, he really was just a dirty old man. There was no doubt of that as Akane kicked him through a hole in the ceiling.

Ryoga had ignored the entire scene. After Ranma's dismissal of the threat to his life, all he could do was glare at him with complete disgust and hatred. "Ranma… I am just… so disappointed in you!!!" he shouted as he walked out the door. Akane gave Ranma one last look before she ran after the eternal lost boy. It really was true. Ranma had given up fighting for good. And without fighting, Ranma had no more passion for anything it seemed. The Ranma she'd known-and even thought she may have loved-was gone. Her heart breaking in two, she focused all of her power on catching up with the eternally lost boy.

One by one, the many friends and family members left, until Ranma was all alone. As the awkward mix of pain and embarrassment welled up in his stomach, Ranma picked up his chop-sticks and stuffed a shrimp into his mouth to quell the pangs of guilt.

Meanwhile, Ryoga marched out of the Tendo's front yard, violently shaking his fist. Over the years, Ranma had evolved from an enemy to a rival to something of a best friend. To see him acting like this made Ryoga… furious!

"Ryoga?"

His heart skipped a beat. As it always was when he heard that voice, all of Ryoga's anger melted away. "Ah, Akane. What is it?" he asked, a soft smile betraying mixed emotions.

"What are you going to do now?" she asked, gripping at her shirt.

"If Ranma's not going to deal with this problem, I'll have to take care of it myself…" he answered.

"No!" she cried out, grabbing onto him and burying her face in his chest. Ryoga blinked in confusion as tears soaked his shirt. "Ranma's been so… detached lately, so unlike himself… I've already lost him. I don't want to lose you too. You're my best friend; I can't lose you too…"

Ryoga sighed. He grabbed Akane in a hug and wiped her tears away with his hand. "You're not going to lose me Akane. I don't plan on fighting this thing alone. I'm not stupid like Ranma…"

Akane looked up at Ryoga. He was staring her in the face, smiling a warm smile he always seemed to reserve just for her. She smiled back, reassured that her friend would not be leaving her for good.

"Akane…" he began, snapping her out of her trance. "I don't deserve a friend like you…"

Now it was Akane's turn to be confused. "Ryoga, what are you…?" Akane couldn't finish, as she felt Ryoga press his forehead to hers. In slow motion, she could see him growing closer and closer. Suddenly, the touch of his lips was upon hers.

Akane couldn't possibly describe the sensation. It was a very simple, chaste kiss, yet it conveyed a powerful rush of emotion and passion. She could feel her very skin tingling with electricity. It was just like how she had read in all of those romance novels.

And yet, at the same time, something about it felt… off, like it just wasn't right, as though she knew that out there was something better. She loved Ryoga, but not like that. It wasn't even like the love between siblings. It was a tender, innocent love, which was so beautiful and perfect, but was too weak to bear the weight of a relationship. In the end, as good as it felt, as much as she loved it, she knew that inside, at its very core, it was hollow, empty. And so she pushed Ryoga away from her and turned back towards the house.

Even without looking at him, she could feel Ryoga's eyes fixed on her, filled with pain and a range of other emotions. She became flustered, trying to explain. She felt she owed him at least that much. "I'm… I'm sorry… I just can't… I don't know why but…"

"You still love him." He said, cutting her off. Akane's eyes opened as wide as they could. "Ryoga…" she whispered, knowing that nothing she said could mend the pain he must be feeling.

"It's okay…" he said, half-chuckling. "I know. You still love him. Even though he's changed so much, even though he's not even himself anymore, on the slight chance that he may come back one day, you still love him. And I completely understand. I tried to fool myself, but I knew that this day would come. I just didn't think I should leave without telling you."

Akane whipped around quickly. "Ryoga. You say that like I'm never going to see you again…"

Despite Akane's interruption, Ryoga continued as though he had not heard her. He reached into his shirt and pulled out a heart-shaped locket. He opened it and placed it in Akane's hands. It contained two pictures. On the left, Ryoga was holding Akari, his girlfriend, close to him. They were sitting beneath a tree, cuddled up together. She had placed her head on the nape of his neck and was playfully twirling his hair. Ryoga was squeezing her gently, stroking her back. She had such an innocent smile. And Ryoga? If anyone other than Akane saw the locket, they wouldn't have even known it was him. He was positively beaming. She'd never seen him so happy before.

On the right was a picture of Ryoga with Akane. She could remember the day that picture was taken so perfectly. They were in one of those photo-booths the Americans had come up with in the mall. They were smiling and sticking their tongues out, with their arms around each other making the "V for victory sign". She giggled a little at the silly image.

"There are two things I've never been able to do in my life…" he whispered, just loud enough for her to hear. "First… I've never been able to find where the Hell I'm going." The two laughed, admittedly a little louder than the joke deserved. "The second," he stated, once their laughter had died down, "was decide…"

"Ryoga…" she mumbled, feeling guilty about hurting her friend.

"But it looks like you decided for me… Like I said, it's alright…" he took her by the hand, comforting her, "Ranma will go back to normal. I promise… He loves you too much"

At that, Ryoga picked up his umbrella and threw the cape and hood he always wore while traveling over his neck. "Hang onto that locket for me. That way you'll have to see me again. I need to get my locket back after all." He shouted, waving behind him as he walked off into the sunset. Akane smirked at the display of manliness, as she clutched the locket to her chest.

He had seen it…

He couldn't hear what they were saying, but he had definitely seen it.

He had seen Ryoga and Akane kissing.

Out of embarrassment and shock, he'd hidden to the side of the window, too scared to move. When he mustered up the courage to look back, he saw Ryoga giving her a locket, holding her hand, and walking off into the sunset as Akane clutched aforementioned locket to her chest.

It was official. Fighting and Akane were both gone from his life. Ranma Saotome had lost everything. Fighting back the tears, he sombered up to his room and locked himself inside.

Meanwhile, Noboru was marching through Nerima, scowling so evilly that it would have put 17th Century English knight "Richard the puppy-kicker" to shame. All the by-standers were frozen in fear at the sight of the 7 foot tall man, in crimson red battle armor, with a long black cape marching through the streets, as though just begging for someone to give him a reason to disembowel them.

HONK!!!

… Was that what he thought it was…?

HONK HONK!!! "GET OFF THE ROAD ASSHOLE!!!" HONK HONK!!!

Was a mere mortal actually thinking to not only yell at him, but to order him around?

Noboru turned to face the car. He walked to the door. The driver did not seem intimidated at all. "You got a problem with me jackass?" he asked, spitting in the demon king's face. His expression of defiance turned to terror as the door was ripped off its hinges. A cold, pale hand, with long, yellow finger-nails almost like claws reached in and grabbed the driver by the throat. Noboru held him in the air with one arm.

"Can you tell me where to find Ranma Saotome…?"

"I don't know who that is. Please put me down!!!"

"You give me orders a second time. You need to learn respect human."

"I'm sorry! Please! I beg your forgiveness!!!"

"You know, when I was young, my friends and I played a game where we would catch butterflies and rip their wings off. I miss that game… Let's see what we can rip off of you…"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

It was very fortunate that Ryoga ran into Nabiki on his way off of their property. Without her help, he'd never have found the places he needed to go. One by one, Ryoga found all of the people he was looking for and recruited their help.

"Aiyah! Airen in danger? Shampoo help!"

"My beloved Shampoo is going to battle the terror of the king of demons. In the name of my love for her, I must protect her!"

"So, the vile Saotome has neglected his duties, and is now allowing a demon to run loose on the streets? Very well, the great Tatewaki Kuno shall assist you!"

"If Ranma-honey needs help, then the Okonomiyaki will have to wait…"

"I've spent my whole life telling Ranma what the duty of a martial artist is. Maybe it's time I lived up to my boasting."

"I will allow nothing to jeopardize my daughter's engagement!"

"Fine. I've been wanting a rematch with that foul beast anyway. He destroyed my beautiful treasures."

"Well, I suppose these old bones still have one more fight left in them. We'll see how this ancient demon handles 300 years of Amazon teachings…"

"You're going off to another fight?"

"Yes Akari…"

"Be careful Ryoga. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you."

"Don't worry. I'll be fine…"

"I love you Ryoga…"

"I love you too Akari… with all my heart."

The kiss was brief, but it contained so much emotion. So many promises; promises of dates and ice cream, promises of a family, promises of growing old together. In one, simple kiss, an entire lifetime of promises was exchanged. A warm feeling came over Ryoga's heart. This kiss was just as beautiful and wonderful as the one he and Akane had shared, but this one was different. This one was **real**.

As Ryoga led his troops towards the battlefield, he pointed to the sky with as much bravo and machismo as he could muster. "Alright everyone! We're going to see just how this king of demons handles the Nerima Wrecking Crew!!!"

"The Nerima Wrecking Crew?" Ukyo asked, blinking in disbelief.

"Yeah… That's us…" he explained.

"What kind of name that?" Shampoo asked in broken Japanese.

"Yeah, that's a horrible name…" Mousse agreed.

"Worst name I ever heard for an army, don't you think Saotome?"

"Well, except for 'The Z Warriors' Tendo."

"Fine, what do you want us to be called?"

"The Mighty Kuno Force!"

"No!"

"The Panty Brigade!"

"Certainly not!"

"Team Ranma?"

"He's not even here!!!"

"No, but he's still a member, right?"

"But he's a sniveling mess right now…"

The argument faded as the 'Nerima Wrecking Crew' marched into battle.

**Well, what do you think? I'm not so sure. I like a lot of it, but there are parts I feel that are lacking. I really like the Ryoga/Akane scene. Normally I really suck with romantic dialogue, but that came out pretty well. I'd have to call that the highlight of this chapter. **

**Next time, Ryoga leads his friends into battle with Noboru, King of Demons. Meanwhile, Akane tries to snap Ranma out of his funk. Will our heroes succeed? Find out.**

**Oh noes! It turns out that Tom Cruise is actually a shape-shifting alien from the planet "Boofenwiesel" He's come to abduct us, as human spleens are a delicacy on his planet. He wants to sell us as food and pets! But hark! A button that says "review" Click it and use the power of your opinion of this chapter to tell Tom Cruise where he can stick Scientology and the planet "Boofenwiesel"!**


	4. The battle within

**Chapter 4: The Battle Within**

**Well, as I sit here, about to start this chapter, I am admittedly angry. I am angry because I realized it had been forever since I had updated, and so I worked extremely hard to produce an absolutely mind-blowing 3****rd**** chapter. As I sat re-reading it over and over, I couldn't help but notice how much my writing had evolved in my 8 month hiatus. I was really looking forward to reading the reviews. Unfortunately, I received only three.**

**Now, I'm not angry about receiving only three reviews. A little disappointed, but not angry… No, I'm angry because one of the three reviewers chose to not give any criticism, or even an opinion on the chapter. No, all they wrote was "Please update faster"**

…

**I had already said I was going to work harder to update faster and acknowledged it had taken a long time to produce that chapter. I'd also pointed out all the extra effort that went into the chapter. That said, this person thought it appropriate to order me to increase my production speed… I'm not getting paid to do this. I'm not your slave. And putting "please" does not make it any less rude or irritating. Please do not use reviews to demand that I increase the speed of my updates, as though I am a machine in a factory that you need only turn a knob on to increase the speed. If you don't have anything to say about the chapter or the writing, then don't even bother leaving a review… That said, I do hunger for criticism, so I beg thee noble reader, please… write something about my work, even if it's just "Lol! (Quote chapter) Nice! Good Work!" If you can write more, great! If you have some actual criticism, fantastic! That said, here's chapter 4**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ranma, damn it!**

"You know… in hindsight, it was probably a bad idea to have Ryoga lead the way…" Ukyo ruminated.

"Since when did Tokyo get so high up?" Ryoga asked.

"We're on top of Mt. Fuji dumbass…" the chef replied.

"Shampoo knew this was wrong way. Shampoo think Great Grandmother should lead."

"Don't worry Shampoo, I'll take care of everything! I'll find this 'Noboru' that Ranma's too scared to fight, and I'll finish him off myself to prove my love for you!" Mouse declared, holding his beloved in his arms.

A look of contempt washed over Tatewaki's face, as he looked down at the blind man holding him. "Me thinks that perhaps thine luck would benefit greatly, if thou wouldst wear your damn glasses you idiot!"

"Say Happosai," Cologne began, "What exactly does this Noboru look like?"

"Well, he… that is… How do I describe it?" Happosai ruminated.

Ukyo sweat dropped. "You saw the king of demons up close and you forgot what he looked like?"

"If the great Tatewaki Kuno may venture a guess, does he sport long claws, messy black hair, and red and black armor, with a red cape?"

"Yes that's it! How'd you know that Kuno?"

Kuno then pointed to an old mountain man watching Noboru destroying a section of Nerima and screaming, "Where are you Ranma Saotome!?!" on his television

"I know how to get there!" Ryoga shouted. He then proceeded to run off in the exact opposite direction.

As Akane walked back into the house, her mind was swirling with thoughts. Would Ryoga be okay? Would Noboru be defeated? Would Ranma ever turn back to normal? How long had Ryoga felt that way? Did these shorts make her butt look big?

Burying her worries, she decided to go looking for Ranma and see if she could try to snap him back to normal one more time. It didn't take long for her to find him. He was sprawled out on the couch, face down in a cushion. Drool dripped down from the couch, as it often did when he napped in that position. But when he looked up at her, his expression wasn't a tired one, but a sad, empty one, and his eyes were so red… Had… had that drool actually been tears?

Ranma's sad expression quickly turned to an angry scowl as he flipped over on his back, determined to find the wall more interesting than his short-tempered fiancée. _'Well that's odd… Now he's not just a pacifist. He also hates me… again…'_

Shaking off the sudden cold shoulder, Akane sat down on the couch next to Ranma and began rubbing his shoulders. Ranma blushed at the sudden contact, feeling the tension in his shoulders melt away. He smiled as Akane laid her head down on his back and said, "You know Ranma, if something's bothering you, you can tell me…"

These moments had become more and more common since the Saffron battle. Even though he fervently denied it to friends and family, Ranma had finally admitted his love for Akane (And she'd admitted hers, in her own way). This had caused much of the tension between the two to melt away, allowing for them to finally express their feelings.

As Akane wrapped her arms around Ranma, he tenderly stroked her hands, allowing all of the pain and sadness he was feeling to melt away. Why, he couldn't even remember what had got him so down! After all, with a girl like Akane-

Oh right! He was angry at _her_, damn it!

"AH! Get off me Akane!" he suddenly shouted, throwing her hands to the side, and moving to the nearby chair. "What's wrong?" she asked, giggling at what she perceived to be shyness. "I thought you were enjoying it…"

"Enjoying it!?!" he screamed. "What makes you think I want an uncute tomboy like you climbing all over me!?! God! Now I need a chemical bath!" He had to push her away. He just had to push her away. He knew he could never stop loving her. The only way to make the pain stop was to push her away.

_'Uncute tomboy!?! What the-!?! He hasn't insulted me like that in ages!… Well, maybe it means he's getting back to normal.' _Akane thought.

"Fine Ranma! I just thought that you might want some affection, since you apparently love me so much. I was feeling charitable after all!" she shouted back. After all, if this meant he was going to go back to normal, she was willing to play their old games.

"YOU'RE talking about charity. I'm the one who's generous for even acting like I don't completely hate you! You're lucky that I'm even willing to be around someone as annoying and uncute as you! In fact, you're lucky that anyone can stand being around someone as annoying as you, you freak!" he shouted, staring at the wall, unwilling to look at her face as his emotional torpedo rocked her.

Whoa! Did Ranma actually just say that!?! Sure, he'd always insulted her, but it was a childish kind of thing. That was just outright hurtful! What had gotten into him now!?!

"Excuse me!?!" was all she could manage to scream back.

"Just get out of here! It's obvious you'd rather be with someone else. Why don't you go stick your tongue down Ryoga's throat for a few hours. Hopefully that'll shut you up, and I won't have to listen to all your nagging!"

_'Ryoga? What does he- Oh no…'_

"Ranma, did you see us just now?"

"Duh… Gee you think? I ain't blind Akane!"

"No Ranma! It's not what you think, Ryoga was just- I mean- We didn't- We don't- I mean"

"Just get out of here Akane! I ain't in the mood!"

Ranma turned just in time to see Akane's trademark battle aura, predicting a visit from mallet-sama. But before he even had a chance to try to dodge, it disappeared. Akane's head just hung down, her hair blocking any view of her face, but just before she ran out of the room, he saw a single tear fall to the ground.

The pang of guilt that always rocked Ranma whenever he made Akane cry hit just as hard as always, but this time, no thoughts of apologies or making it up crossed his mind. He just got back on the couch, buried his face, and brought up thoughts of seppuku to keep the tears back.

"BRING ME RANMA SAOTOME, DAMN IT!!!"

Nerima's citizens ran and screamed in fear as the violent King of Demons tossed cars left and right and blasted energy from his palms. The entire city block was in complete ruin, and the damage was just escalating. If something wasn't done soon, the entire city would be leveled.

Maybe even the entire island.

"_**SHI SHI HOKODAN**_!!!"

What was this? A sudden burst of ki? Noboru turned to the source of the energy spike to find a blast of red energy flying towards him. A quick swipe of his hand was all it took to deflect the blast into a nearby orphanage.

"NOBORU! WE'RE NOT GOING TO LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS ANY LONGER!!!"

"Who's that!?!" the demon king shouted, looking for the source of the surprise attack.

"Up here!" came the reply. Sure enough, standing atop the remains of a ruined building was Ryoga and Co.

"Nobody wrecks Nerima but the Nerima Wrecking Crew!" he shouted.

"That's an absolutely terrible name…" Noboru replied.

"I told you." Mousse grumbled.

"Shut up!"

Noboru ignored the in-fighting of his new foes, proclaiming, "I don't know what you hope to accomplish, but I suggest you leave humans! No one will stop me from taking my revenge on Saotome!"

"Saotome is our friend!" Ukyo shouted.

"I won't let you lay a hand on my son!" Genma added.

"Saotome… WHAT A COWARD! HE SENDS HIS PATHETIC FRIENDS TO FIGHT ME INSTEAD OF FACING ME HIMSELF!!!"

"Why demon-king hate Airen so much? Airen good man! Always nice to everyone, except mean people!" Shampoo cried out in broken Japanese.

"Mere words cannot describe the depths of my suffering. Thanks to Ranma Saotome… I HAVE SEEN HELL!!!"

Ryoga just chuckled solemnly. "I used to have the same look in my eyes as you pal… It's a road that leads nowhere…"

"What can you possibly know about my pain!?!" Noboru countered.

"Because… Ranma became my best friend… After I swore to destroy him for ruining my life!!!"

At that, Ryoga leapt from the building with a spinning axe kick, determined to finish the fight quickly. Noboru simply smirked and raised his arm, taking the full force of the kick.

"He blocked Ryoga's kick with just one arm!?!" Soun shouted in shock.

Recovering quickly, Ryoga pushed off of Noboru's arm and flipped in the air. He then launched 2 flying side-kicks, both blocked as easily as his first kick. As Ryoga landed on the ground, Noboru brought down his claws to hack at his foes body, but felt a sudden jolt as they were somehow blocked.

In an instant, Mousse had appeared in front of Ryoga, producing twin blades from the inner confines of his robes, blocking Noboru's claws. He slashed at the demon's chest, but Noboru simply leapt into the air.

Retracting his blades, Mousse cried, "You're not getting off that easily!" And launched several weighted chains from his sleeves, ensnaring the foul beast. He then spun on his heels, swinging Noboru into the wall of a building.

As Noboru freed himself from the resulting crater, he was greeted with the cry of "HAPPO FIRE BURST!!!" and several bombs in his face. It appeared that the explosion had destroyed Noboru, until he flew from the dust unharmed. He brought his knee into Happosai's gut and drop kicked him into the dirt. His energy blasts then knocked Mousse back into a tree, and stunned Ryoga long enough for him to come crashing down into him with an elbow smash.

Shampoo and Ukyo, in a rare instance of comradery, charged Noboru together. Noboru was forced to use both hands to block the spatula and bonbori, allowing for Cologne to surprise him with a thrust of her staff to his chest, bringing him to his knees. Soun then proceeded to launch a flying side kick to the demon's face, finally bringing him to the ground.

"NOW SAOTOME!" he cried out, hoping their new technique would finish Noboru for good.

"What!?!" Noboru exclaimed, noticing an ever expanding shadow around him. He only had enough time to sweat drop before a gigantic panda fell from the sky and crushed him.

Proud of having felled the supposedly omnipotent king of demons, Genma proceeded to celebrate as he always did: By rolling around with a tire in his paws. The tire was soon incinerated as an energy blast launched Genma into the air. Noboru was quick to fire two more into Shampoo and Ukyo, knocking them out. As Cologne charged with her staff, Noboru merely grabbed it and flung the 300 year old Amazon into a car.

Ryoga and Mousse charged the foul demon once more, and were rewarded with an elbow in Mousse's face and a right cross in Ryoga's for their trouble. As Noboru turned to wreak vengeance on Soun, the man, quite predictably, broke down and began weeping openly. Noboru stared at him uncomfortably for a few moments before turning to continue carving his swath of destruction.

But as he turned towards the setting sun, a silhouette stood in the distance, its hair bouncing in the wind.

"Foul beast. You may think thyself mighty for besting the mere commoners, but how will thee fare against a noble modern-day Samurai."

"A samurai?" the beast asked in disbelief.

"You should be proud, demon. For once you are back in Hell, you may tell the other demons that you had the honor, nay, the privilege, of being slain by the Blue Thunder of Furinkin High: The Great Tatewaki Kuno, age 19…"

"Is he still the Blue Thunder of Furinkin High if he graduated two years ago Tendo?" Genma asked.

"No Saotome. In fact, I find it quite odd that he keeps going back to that High School, considering he should be in college at this point." Soun answered

"Kuno's going to fight the demon?" Ryoga asked as he picked himself off the ground.

"Somehow, I don't expect this to go well…" Ukyo muttered.

"HAVE AT THEE!!! TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TA!!!" Kuno shouted, charging with his bokken. The NWC was shocked to see Noboru actually having trouble defending against the attacks Kuno threw at Ranma every day, with little to no success.

"Of course…" Mousse realized, "Ranma avoids Kuno's attacks so easily because Kuno uses the same combination every time, and Ranma's learned to predict it. To Noboru, who's never seen it before, it's actually a threat!"

Though he was able to avoid most of the strikes, one or two of Kuno's attacks had been able to catch Noboru in the gut, and his patience was wearing thin. "ENOUGH!!!" he shouted, grabbing the bokken in his mighty claws. Try as he may, the great Tatewaki Kuno was unable to extricate his weapon.

"Fool! What kind of stupid samurai charges a demon with a wooden sword!?!" the demon asked, laughing. He was then shocked when Kuno began to laugh as well. As his chuckling died down, he cast Noboru a cocky grin.

With the calm and elegant poise he was so known for, Kuno whispered, just loud enough for everyone to hear,

"Many commoners think Tatewaki Kuno to be a fool… 'Tis a reputation he happily reinforces, as it make it all the more easier for Tatewaki Kuno to fool _them_…"

Before Noboru could question what the semi-delusional kendoist meant, Kuno unsheathed an actual katana, hidden within his apparently hollow bokken and slashed at Noboru's chest. Noboru's surprise was so great that he just barely avoided being sliced in two, although the cut Kuno left would certainly be a great scar.

Clutching at his wound, Noboru seethed with anger. It was time to destroy this "samurai" once and for all. He leapt high into the air, preparing a great energy blast with which to wipe out Kuno and all of the NWC.

It was then that Kuno shocked everyone else for a third time that day, by leaping into the sky, just as high as Noboru, and cutting him a second time, this time deeper than the first. He then launched a flurry of attacks, this time different than his usual pattern. A swipe at the neck! A chop at the arm! Noboru was hard pressed to block all of these attacks with his claws, and more and more wounds were appearing on his body.

"When crazy samurai get so good?" Shampoo asked.

As the two combatants fell back to Earth, they leapt away from each other, assuming their stances once again. A grin crept across Kuno's face as he heard the girl's question.

"Fair maiden of the Amazon, allow me to explain. 'Twas near the end of the last school year, when I witnessed Ranma Saotome battling Ryoga Hibiki. I was shocked to my utter core when I saw them unveil their new techniques. The Shi Shi Hokodan. The Moko Takebisha. It was then that I realized that I, the great Tatewaki Kuno, had been surpassed by warriors far greater than I. And so, as any great warrior should, I chose to, rather than get depressed, seek to better myself. I trained until the hilt of my sword had sprouted roots within my palms. I prayed to my ancestors for wisdom and guidance. I poured through scroll after scroll, determined to once again be seen as a worthy rival by Ranma Saotome. As much as I may hate him, I feel gratitude towards him, for without him, I would not be the mighty samurai that I am now!!!"

As Kuno told his story, a great blue aura swelled around him. For the fourth time, he had shocked his compatriots, this time with his newfound battle aura.

"Foul Beast! Forgive me, for I just recently developed this new technique with the hopes of using it on Saotome. I know not yet how to completely control it…"

For the first time since the battle began, Noboru started to show signs of actual concern, and perhaps even fear, as Kuno's mighty aura grew larger and larger before finally focusing around his blade.

"Saotome has his confidence… Hibiki his depression… And me?... I obviously have my… WARRIOR'S PRIDE!!! TATEWAKI KUNO STYLE KENDO! SECRET TECHNIQUE! _**AOI KAMINARI OUDA**_!!!

The blue light shot fourth, crashing into Noboru at blinding speed. All onlookers were blinded by the magnificent explosion. Noboru could be heard cursing Kuno's name, just over the blast.

He could not believe it.

Ryoga Hibiki could not believe it.

The day had been saved… by Kuno…

The same Kuno who once had to be rushed to the emergency room because he thought that if he swallowed the ashes of his samurai ancestors, their spirits would be with him in battle... had just saved the day…

"That was a good one… 'Samurai'…"

It couldn't be…

"But it wasn't good enough…"

It was…

When the smoke cleared, Noboru was unscathed, save for a mark on the hand he had stretched out to stop the blast, and the cuts Kuno had given him before. He opened and closed his fist, trying to awaken his, now numb, hand.

Kuno seemed more annoyed than anything else. "You still live, foul beast? Then have another! _**AOI KIMI-**_"

Before he could finish, Noboru was right in front of him. "TOO SLOW!" he shouted, as he punched Kuno in the face. As the samurai was still reeling from the blow, Noboru shot several kicks into his gut, before finally slashing at his chest with his claws. Blood spattered everywhere

"Don't worry. I made sure not to wound you fatally. I still have more cuts to pay you back for!!!" the demon laughed as he raised his claws in the air.

The entire NWC leapt to their feet to save their… friend? Sure, why not?

But they all knew it was a futile effort. They wouldn't reach him in time.

And yet, when Noboru's claws finally made contact, it was with street and street alone. Furious, he looked around, trying to find where his prey had escaped to.

"You know, I'd appreciate it if you didn't kill my best customer. If it wasn't for him getting hurt all the time, I don't think I'd have any business at all."

The NWC was shocked to see who had saved Kuno. The samurai was now slung over the newcomer's shoulder. The man emanated a vicious killing intent, and yet the look on his face was a calm, peaceful one, with a warm smile. His appearance and aura clashed so violently.

"What are you doing here?" Mousse asked.

"I saw you guys were having trouble on my TV, so I thought I'd lend a hand." The man answered.

"Well, we're sure glad to see you Sensei," Soun said, relieved at the reinforcements. The man just smiled.

"I think you can just leave everything to me…" Dr. Tofu replied.

**After being gone for over half of the manga, Dr. Tofu returns! Ranma had sensed he was a powerful martial artist on their first meeting, but just how strong is he? Can this man, who has spent his life repairing the bodies of humans, possibly destroy the body of a demon? And what of Ranma Saotome? Will he stop being a little emo, pacifist douchebag in time to save the day and get the girl? The answers to these questions and more, next time!!!**

**Hopefully this chapter will get more reviews. Or at least better ones.**

**For reference, Kuno's attack "Aoi Kaminari Ouda" is Japanese for "Blue Thunder Strike", assuming my use of online translators was accurate. And Soun refers to Dr. Tofu as "sensei" because you use that title for teachers AND doctors. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. I have so many cool ideas about what to do with Dr. Tofu.**

**I ran out of little clever ways of asking for reviews, so just review or I'll come into your house tonight and sprinkle Jusenkyo water on you! Yeah! I'm thinking of Spring of Drowned Dominatrix. Or perhaps Spring of Drowned Platypus! You could be God's prank on mammals!**


	5. Take Your medicine

**Ah yes, another chapter to grace my adoring fans. Oh how I love you!**

**The reviews I got for the last chapter were excellent! They made me so happy; I thought I would burst into tears from the joy!**

**One quick note. The last chapter was the last insanely long chapter. The chapter lengths are going to get a bit under control after one reviewer pointed out that they were getting longer than Father Time's beard.**

**  
Disclaimer: Yes… I own Ranma ½… Can't you tell from the fact that I'm a little old Japanese Lady, and not an American Teenage boy…? Dumbass…**

**Chapter 5: Take Your Medicine**

The air was thick with tension, as Dr. Tofu and Noboru stared each other down. Noboru was crouched, ready to strike down his new foe at a moment's notice. Dr. Tofu radiated with killing intent, and yet he just stood with his hands in his pockets, smiling as though he hadn't a care in the world.

"So, Dr. Tofu's going to fight the demon now?" Mousse asked, confused at what was going on.

"I confess I'm as confused as you are Mousse. I was under the impression that the man knew only how to repair bodies, not destroy them…" Cologne responded, perched atop her staff.

"Ranma once told me that Dr. Tofu was a powerful martial artist," Ryoga said, "But I don't think I've ever seen him fight,"

"None of us have," Soun added.

As the group of fighters watched the two combatants prepare, they could feel an uneasiness between each other. All of them knew that even the slightest twitch could be enough to set off one of the martial artists and draw their attack.

Suddenly, Dr. Tofu turned to face the crew and shouted, "Ryoga! Can you do me a favor?"

Noboru didn't hesitate. He immediately launched into action, bringing one of his mighty claws down to hack Tofu to pieces. Without even looking back, Dr. Tofu raised one hand and caught the demon's wrist, stopping his attack with seemingly little effort. The smile never left his face.

"I was just wondering if you could come over here and get my glasses from me. I need someone to hold onto them," he continued, as though nothing had even happened. Wide-eyed, Ryoga was powerless to do much other then mutter "Uh-huh…" before carrying out the Doctor's request and returning to his friends.

In an instant, the doctor released Noboru's wrist and slammed his fist into the demon's chest, knocking him back to where he had originally started, before he even knew what had happened. As Noboru clutched his chest and groaned, the formerly ever-present smile on Dr. Tofu's face slowly vanished, as he took off his doctor's coat, and threw it into the wind heroically.

"No matter what technique it is, every martial arts move has some degree of anatomy and biology present," he stated, eyes fixed on Noboru. "Because of their many battles, every martial artist has some knowledge of how the human body works, because without it, their techniques would not be sufficient to destroy their enemies. But my understanding of the human physiology is so vast and comprehensive, that it allows me use of techniques other fighters could only dream of…"

As Noboru listened, his eyes widened. His smile soon followed. "Was that your plan!?!" the demon cried before breaking into maniacal laughter. "You idiot! I'm not human! I'm a demon. My physiology is completely different from that off humans! Your techniques can't possibly affect my body!!!"

"Who said anything about affecting your body?" the doctor replied.

As he deepened into a horse stance, the doctor began grunting, almost primitively. As his battle aura flared up around him, the veins in his arms and forehead began to bulge. The ground cracked and shattered around him. Small bursts of electricity sparked through the air.

Slowly, his muscles began to expand and contract violently. His whole body was undergoing some kind of metamorphosis. As his muscles began to grow larger and more powerful, his shirt was forced to give way and tear, as though it were made of rice paper.

Where a small and unimposing man had once stood, an incredible hulk (Yay references!) had taken his place. In a matter of moments, the doctor's body had changed from that of an athletic, but slender form into that of a body builder. He'd gained at least 120 pounds of muscle mass!

"LET'S DO THIS!!!"

The doctor launched forward, swinging the ridge of his open hand into Noboru's face with a sickening boom. As the demon reeled backward, Tofu followed with a spinning back-fist. Recovering, Noboru held up his arm to block the technique. Although he was successful in blocking Tofu's forearm, the man astonished (and disgusted) his friends, by dislocating his elbow, allowing the attack to continue and connect with the monster's chin once more.

"Like I said, I'm a doctor. My knowledge of the human body allows me access to techniques you can only dream of…" the doctor taunted, as he reconnected his joint.

"I can't believe Saotome's poor judgment…" Ryoga muttered. "Sure, he's got a lot of power and good medical knowledge, but his technique is so sloppy. He's just swinging his fists like an untrained fighter."

Cologne proceeded to bop the boy over the top of his head. "Fool boy, that's Piguaquan!"

"Aiyah! Shampoo see it too!" the Amazon girl replied.

"Piguaquan? Is that some deadly martial art?" Ukyo asked.

"Indeed. It's a Chinese martial art," Mousse answered, "When a fighter is untrained, he often attempts to swing his fist in an arc. Most martial arts will teach that this is a bad idea and that the correct technique is to punch in a straight line. However, Piguaquan operates on the idea that if it's the body's natural instinct, there's probably something behind it. And so it teaches a way of swinging your arms and legs like whips for maximum damage. Although it's very ineffective when you start out, a master can kill most fighters with a single blow."

Noboru screamed like a man without reason as he fired a massive energy blast at the doctor, determined to wipe him from the face of the Earth. The doctor proceeded to leap over this blast with ease, swinging his leg into the demon's face as he came back down to Earth. He then jammed his fist right into the monster's ribs, causing him to yelp with pain.

Realizing that this approach was failing, Noboru took to the sky, hoping to buy some time. It was to no avail, as Dr. Tofu simply followed him, ready to continue to pummel his foe into demon-paste. The demon immediately switched direction flying away as fast as he could. Dr. Tofu was faster, however, and was gaining ground quickly.

Hoping that a sneak attack could work, Noboru stopped on a dime and prepared to swing his claws, ready to slash Dr. Tofu to pieces. But before he could dice Tofu into a salad, the man disappeared from sight.

"Behind you!"

As Noboru turned, Dr. Tofu's fist slammed into his face, sending him flying through the air. Dr. Tofu gave chase, and before Noboru was even seeing straight again, the doctor delivered a chop into the back of his neck, knocking him to the ground.

As the doctor floated back to Earth, his friends greeted him with cries of, "You did it!", "That was amazing!", and "Teach me how to do that!"

"It's not over yet!" he shouted. The NWC couldn't believe that anything could survive the ass-kicking that Dr. Tofu had just dished out. But like the doctor predicted, a dazed and bloodied Noboru crawled out of the hole in the ground.

"Do you think you've won human!?! Are you really stupid enough to think that any human's power could best a demon's!?!" the beast shouted, appearing to have gone completely feral. "Fool! You've barely seen a fraction of my awesome power! The trip from the world of demons to the world of humans took much of my power, and forced me to take the form you see now! This body is a mere shell, to allow me to recover my full power! Once I'm back at 100%, I'll crush you completely and utterly!!!"

"You mean this guy's been fighting us with almost none of his full strength!?!" Ryoga shouted, as frightened as the rest of the NWC.

Tofu just smirked. "Then I'll just destroy you before you're back at 100%..."

This did little to curb Noboru's confidence. "You idiot! What do you think this is!?! An anime!?! Do you really think I'd tell you that if I wasn't already close to full power!?!"

"What!?!" the gang shouted in unison.

A smile betraying vicious killing intent spread across the demon's face. "You have ten seconds…"

"Stop him!!!" Cologne shouted, as the group rushed Noboru.

"Ten, Nine, Eight…"

"We can't let him reach his full power!!!" Soun shouted, as he wept openly.

"Seven, Six, Five…"

The group rushed as quickly as their legs could carry them. Ryoga, in an act of superhuman speed and strength, leapt into the air, preparing to crush the demon with one mighty kick.

"Four, Three, Two…"

He screamed a mighty battle cry as he spun through the air, his leg ready to break through the demon's skull.

"One…"

**Okay, so this chapter was originally going to be a lot longer, but I decided to cut it into two or three smaller chapters. The bad news is that, other than being far too long for any one human being to read, the original chapter was much more epic, because it was more than just Dr. Tofu beating the shit out of Noboru. It had a lot of romance and comedy and epicness. The good news is that I had finished the chapter as it was meant to be written, so the next chapter, and possibly the one after that (Depending on how I decide to split them) are already written, so they won't take long to come out. The other bad news is that I'm going to hold onto them for a while, because this is a really cool cliffhanger and I want to let it sink in… Yep, I'm just that evil…**

**Next time, in his full power state, Noboru totally owns the NWC. Meanwhile, Akane tries one last time to get Ranma to stop being a stubborn asshole. What will happen? Find out.**

**Oh noes! Your idiot cousin rented "Dragonball: Evolution" for your family's movie night. But hark! A button that says "Review" click it to go to a world where "Dragonball: Evolution" doesn't exist and Justin Chatwin had his balls cut off.**


	6. Full Power

**Well, last chapter got two reviews… "You wrote well"**

**Thank you very much James Birdsong...**

**"Please hurry up with the next chapter"**

…

**Did I not just explain this a few chapters ago…? When you review, leave criticism, comment on something I wrote, do something related to the chapter! Don't tell me "update soon" "Update faster" "update now!" etc. That is a pet peeve of mine, it irritates me to no end! In fact, that's why I intentionally waited this long to post the chapter! You understand? Every time someone does that, I am going to withhold chapters!**

**I'm not begging for reviews, I'm just saying that if you do review, write something else!**

**At any rate, here. And more of you review this time, damn it. There are a couple hundred people reading. More than two of you have time to write a damn review!**

**And I'm not begging for reviews here either... I'm demanding them with a childish sense of entitlement...**

**Chapter 6: Full power**

As Noboru finished counting down, Ryoga's foot blasted into his head with all of his might behind it. Every ounce of strength he had was dedicated to stopping this demon once and for all. And for a moment, it looked like he had done it. Noboru's face glazed over, as though taken by unconsciousness. But in an instant, his head shattered, like it was made of glass.

Then his chest shattered, as an energy blast ten times as powerful as the ones before burst through and slammed into Ryoga.

As Noboru's shell crumbled away, an entirely new being stood in its wake. The old Noboru had looked like some kind of monster from a child's fairy tale gone horribly wrong. He'd been a mountain, at least 7 feet tall, with gigantic muscles. He'd had long, unruly hair, with sharp fangs and claws.

This Noboru, however, seemed almost human. He had a build much like most of the NWC's male members: Athletic, yet slender. His hair was still long, but tame. His fangs remained, but they were more like Ryoga's snaggleteeth. Really, the only things demonic about him were two small horns poking out from behind his hair and a cryptic, evil design on his now golden armor.

He opened his mouth, allowing a long, snake-like tongue to unfold. He licked his teeth menacingly as he eyed his opponents. "Well… You had ten seconds to stop me from transforming… So, I'll give myself ten seconds to wipe all of you from the face of the Earth!!!"

Back at the Tendo dojo, Ranma was sitting silently in the family room. He moved not one muscle, hanging his head low as he sat on the couch, thinking to himself. What had gone wrong? His logic was flawless. Fighting had gotten him cursed at Jusenkyo, gained him 3 fiancées and 2 crazy stalkers, caused several people to want him dead, destroyed his wedding, and almost killed the woman he loved. So the obvious solution was to simply become a pacifist.

And yet, doing so had gotten a crazy demon after him, made his arch-rival/best friend hate him, driven the woman he loved into the arms of his arch-rival/best friend, made him hurt her feelings, and alienated him from everyone he cared about.

Was the problem not fighting? Was it just him? Was Ranma just cursed to constantly attract bad luck? In the end, did it really not matter what he did, because he was always going to be plagued by misfortune?

Why then? Why was he so unlucky? Had he made some Kami upset? Was his karma just as bad as Happosai's? What did he have to do to get some peace and quiet?

A voice interrupted his train of thought. "Ranma?" it said.

Turning to the source just reminded him of how guilty he felt. "Oh, Akane…what do you want now?" he grumbled, trying not to let her see him upset.

Akane just had to explain, before he became hostile again. "Ranma, listen to me. It's not what you think!"

"Oh, so Ryoga didn't just kiss you!?!"

"Well, he did, but-"

"But nothin'! I don't wanna hear it!"

"Ranma, you're overreacting!"

"I just saw my friend kissing my fiancée!"

"And how many times have I seen girls climbing all over you!?!"

"That's different!"

"And how is that!?!"

"Because all those times, you just assumed I was doin' something before I had a chance to explain, and all those times I was completely innocent!"

"And you're not doing the same thing right now!?!"

"Just shut up Akane… Go away…"

"I don't have to go away! This is my house! The _Tendo _dojo!"

"Screw you…"

Having failed to reconcile with Ranma, Akane sat down on the chair at the opposite end of the room: the one usually reserved for her father. Come to think of it, where was her father? Or Ranma's for that matter?

Pushing that thought aside for a moment, she wondered, _'How can I get through to Ranma? He's… such a baka!'_ She fidgeted with the remote, staring at him, as she tried to figure it out.

"So, are you going to turn on the TV, or are you just going to sit there staring at me like an idiot?" he asked bluntly.

"Ranma, you're an asshole…" she muttered as she flicked on the television.

"Well, that makes me feel better…" he replied.

As the TV came alive, the two teenagers were greeted with the image of Noboru strangling Dr. Tofu in one hand and slamming Ryoga's face into the concrete with another.

"As does that…" Ranma continued…

"Oh my god!" Akane screamed, horrified at the sight. "We have to go save them!"

"What's this 'we' stuff?" Ranma asked.

"Ranma, you can't honestly be saying you're not going to help…" Akane asked, horrified at Ranma's cold-heartedness.

"I've given up fighting, remember? And I'm sorry if I ain't exactly feeling like breaking that for the likes of Ryoga at the moment." Ranma responded nonchalantly.

"I can't believe you!!! Ranma… You're a completely different person!!! I hate you!!!" she shouted, as she ran out of the room.

Yep… No matter what, Ranma Saotome was not going to win.

Back on the battlefield, things were not going so well. Kuno was still unconscious, Noboru had defeated almost all of our heroes, Soun was still crying like a two-year old, and the demon-king showed no signs of slowing down.

Noboru had begun by slamming his fist into Happosai's gut, flooring him instantly.

As Cologne attempted to help her once-upon-a-time lover, Noboru had fired an energy blast at her, taking her out of the fight.

Ukyo was next, as Noboru had appeared behind her suddenly and elbowed her in the back of the head, knocking her unconscious.

She was soon followed by Shampoo, who had tried to attack the demon king while his back was turned and had been rewarded by being knocked into a collapsing building.

Genma, for once, had not reacted with cowardice. He'd looked the demon right in the eye, dropped into a deep stance, and cried out "FOUL DEMON!!! YOU GIVE ME NO CHOICE!!! SAOTOME SCHOOL OF ANYTHING GOES MARTIAL ARTS FINAL ATTACK!!!"

"Saotome…" Noboru repeated.

"Final attack?" Dr. Tofu finished for him.

"Not this idiocy again…" Ryoga muttered, remembering when Ranma had used this attack on him.

Genma turned his back to the demon and shouted "READY! SET! RUN AWAY!!!"

Okay, so he did react with cowardice…

Ryoga and Dr. Tofu charged the demon, who leapt atop a nearby building to avoid their attacks. They followed him and engaged him in a flurry of martial arts attacks, giving their all to destroying the foe. Noboru, however, was defending their attacks with ease and knocked them from the rooftop to the ground.

Mousse, on the other hand, was running about frantically, desperately trying to find Shampoo. When he did, his heart skipped a beat.

The Amazon girl was trapped under a heap of rubble. Normally, her strength would be more than enough to free herself, but Noboru had beaten her so badly, she was lucky to be alive.

"SHAMPOO!" Mousse shouted upon seeing his beloved.

Thinking nothing of his own safety, Mousse rushed forth to save her. As Noboru stood atop the building, reveling in the carnage, he spied the blind man. "Missed one!" he shouted to himself, laughing as he fired energy blasts towards the one-man rescue team.

Mousse dodged and leapt through the air, every movement pushing his weary body closer and closer to the point of falling apart. Finally, one blast had caught up to him. With no time to dodge, Mousse threw his arm into the air, allowing it to take the brunt of the impact. He was bleeding profusely, and his arm couldn't move, but he had to keep going. Nothing could stand in the way of rescuing Shampoo.

One of the few fighters still standing, Ryoga charged the building Noboru used as a foothold. "_**BAKUSAI TENKETSU!!!" **_he shouted. The building crumbled beneath the demon, who fell to the ground less than elegantly.

"That was a nice trick, fool! But it won't save you!" he growled as he climbed up from underneath the ruined building. He launched forward, attacking mercilessly.

Meanwhile, Shampoo had given up trying to free herself. It was only making her injuries worse. It seemed that this really would be her end: crushed underneath piles of debris, unable to look upon her Airen's face one last time.

"Shampoo! Don't worry! I'm here!" she heard someone say. The pressure squeezing the life out of her was relieved as Mousse lifted the rubble and unceremoniously chucked it away.

"Mousse… you… rescue Shampoo…" she said weakly, clutching her sides.

"It's okay Shampoo. I'm here. I'm going to protect you with my life," he replied, taking her hands.

"Mousse… Your arm is bleeding…" she stated in shock, seeing his mangled limb.

"It's alright. Noboru blasted me as I was coming over to help you. I'll be fine…" he responded, clutching his bum arm

"Why you save me Mousse?" she asked, tears welling up in her eyes, "Why you risk your life when Shampoo always so mean to you?"

Mousse looked at her, genuinely confused. "Because I love you Shampoo…" he answered, as though she should've realized. He said it like he was saying "A watch tells time" or "Gravity holds you to the Earth" or possibly "Puppies are quite delicious in meatball form", considering that Mousse was Chinese…*

He continued "I've loved you since the first day I saw you. You're so beautiful and precious, that I've always had no choice but to love you…"

"Mousse…"

"Shampoo…"

Their faces drew closer and closer, as they prepared to embrace each other. Before they could finish, however, Noboru dropped out of the sky, digging his knee into Mousse's ribs.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!" he screamed in pain.

Chuckling, the demon king said, "Being a good villain is like being a photographer. You have to know just when to go 'snap'!"

"I'm going to help them…"

The words had broken Ranma from his thoughts. As he sat up, Akane walked by him to the front door.

"Akane, what are you thinking!?! You can't help, you're just going to get yourself killed!" he shouted.

"That may be true, but at least I'll have tried! Did you really think that the world would stop turning just because you did Ranma!?! Did you really think that you could just stop, and the nut-jobs would stop coming!?! ALL YOU'RE DOING IS LETTING PEOPLE GET HURT: PEOPLE YOU COULD'VE SAVED! YOU'RE JUST HURTING THE PEOPLE WHO CARE ABOUT YOU!!! I HATE YOU!!!"Before Ranma could reply, Akane walked out the door, slamming it in his face.

And so Ranma was left alone. And for once in his life of paying for other people's mistakes, he knew that he had no one to blame but himself…

***Yay Racial Humor!**

**I'm very excited about the next chapter. This is the one that I've been waiting for.**

**Next time, Noboru continues his rampage. Akane rushes to help her friends. Ryoga stands alone against destruction incarnate. Will Akane make it there in time? Will she be able to help? Will Ranma come to his senses in time to save his friends? It's the most exciting, dramatic chapter yet! Battles will be fought! Lives will be changed! And one of our heroes… will… die…**

**Oh noes! Your mother has told you that fanfiction is stupid and she doesn't want you reading it anymore, because it's keeping you from doing things like getting a real job! … Shoot her… Then review this chapter…**


	7. Akane to the Rescue!

**Chapter 7: Akane to the Rescue**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ranma**

**I'm back…**

"HA HA HA HA HA!!!" Noboru laughed menacingly at the pain he had inflicted upon the humans. Torturing them had proven more amusement than he'd expected. Still, he'd wasted enough time. There was still Ranma to think about and the longer he took here, the longer it was until he'd have his revenge.

As Noboru raised his claws into the air to deliver the final blow to Mousse, Shampoo managed to propel herself forward, slamming her bonbori into the demon king. As he was knocked back, Shampoo fell to the ground, collapsing under her own weight. Mustering what little strength she had, she crawled over to Mousse's unconscious form. Gingerly, she rubbed his head, brushing some hair out of his face.

Barely whispering, she said in her native language, "Mousse. Ever since we were little, you've always looked out for me… It's time for me to look out for you…"

Despite the strain on her, more likely than not, broken limbs, Shampoo lifted herself and Mousse and began to hobble away as quickly as she could. Noboru, however, had other plans.

"You will not escape!" he shouted, running after him. Just as he was about to cut the two to pieces, the ground beneath him crumbled, trapping him in a newly formed crevice.

"Baku…sai…Ten…Ketsu…" Ryoga forced out, his finger implanted in the ground.

Growling, Noboru yelled, "That is the second time you've caught me with that technique… It's time for you to die!!! _**MAKA ZENAKU**_!"

"_**SHI SHI HOKODAN!!!"**_

The two chi blasts clashed in a furious blaze, tearing the ground asunder. As they exploded, both fighters were hit with the full force of the blast. Ryoga was smacked to the ground. As he looked up, he saw the shadow of Noboru descending upon him, ready to kill.

'S_o, this is how it ends, huh?' _he thought grimly. '_Killed by a monster, trying to protect my greatest enemy, because he's too much of a coward to face it himself. I'll never see Akane or Akari again… In the end, I'll have been nothing more than a speck of dust in the wind…_'

As Noboru's killing stroke descended upon him, Ryoga solemnly closed his eyes.

'_Truly, truly, truly… The world is a dark and lonely place…_'

"BAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

The war-cry brought Ryoga back to his senses, as a too too familiar mallet came crashing into Noboru's skull, propelling him through the sky.

"Akane?" Ryoga asked incredulously.

"I saw the fight on the news and came to help," she explained.

A few meters off, Dr. Tofu climbed out from under some rubble. "You shouldn't have come Akane… It's too dangerous…"

"I'll be fine sensei. Really."

"You should listen to the doctor…" a cold voice replied from behind her.

Akane turned around to find herself face to face with the king of demons. Gasping in shock, she backed up instinctively, only to trip and fall onto the ground.

"You hit me… with a mallet… That is… so… annoying… What the hell kind of person does something like that? I really hope you don't make a habit out of it…" he grunted.

"Umm…"

"You're dead…"

"Keep your hands off her!!!" Ryoga shouted, lunging at Noboru. In his weakened state, however, he was not much of a threat. Noboru quickly smacked him down to the ground.

"Ryoga!" Tofu shouted, running to help the lost boy. However, an energy blast quickly knocked him unconscious.

'_That blast should've incinerated him. Fighting these humans has taken its toll. After I dispose of this girl, I'll have to rest before finally killing Saotome…'_

"I hope you've lived a good life, little girl… Because it ends here…" Noboru growled, raising his claws above his head.

Akane was screaming in her head, paralyzed by fear. She knew that if she couldn't move, she would be sliced to bits. Or at least she would if Noboru's claws came down upon her. But instead, she was surprised that his attack had been stopped, his claws blocked by a katana.

"Foul demon! Thou shalt not touch the virtuous Akane Tendo!" Kuno shouted, his sword at the ready.

"Kuno…" Akane whispered, too shocked to speak at her normal volume, "You saved me…"

"Of course, Akane Tendo. Didst I not tell you every day of the love I feel for you? What kind of lowly commoner would not protect the woman he claimed to love? Only a vile, pathetic wretch, of course…"

For the first time in her life, Akane was able to see as more than just an annoying idiot intent on molesting her. She saw deep down… deep, deep, deep, deep, DEEP down, to a part of him no one ever bothered to notice: a kind, brave, honorable man.

"Thank you Kuno-sempai…" she whispered

"You again! Samurai, you test my patience!" Noboru screamed.

"The great and bold Tatewaki Kuno knows neither death nor fear. He confronts evil head on and, with great skill, destroys it! You've met your match beast!" the delusional swordsman proclaimed.

He slashed at Noboru with as much force as he could muster, but in the demon's new form, he was much faster than before and dodged quite easily. Kuno gave chase ready to strike down the foul beast, but the crafty demon suddenly appeared behind him and struck him in the back. Still, reeling from the blow, Kuno turned to slice Noboru open, but the demon disappeared and reappeared once again, striking Kuno from multiple directions.

_'This demon has become more powerful since we last did battle. Truly, he is a foe worthy of the Great Tatewaki Kuno! But I must not let my finding of such an adversary shake me. A plan is required if I am to protect Akane Tendo… Within my body is enough power for one last __**"Aoi Kaminari Ouda". **__If I cannot fell the demon with this. All hope is lost. I must make this count…'_

Having formulated his plan, Kuno leapt and flipped through the air, determined to put enough space between him and the demon. He pointed his sword at Noboru and cried, "FOUL DEMON! THOU ART VANQUISHED!!!" as a surge of blue energy collected around him.

_'What… What power!!!'_ Noboru screamed within his head. _'I can't block that attack if he unleashes it! My only chance is the "__**Maka Zenaku"! **__But I can't build up enough power in time to kill him! Then again… I don't have to kill him, do I?'_

An evil smirk crosses Noboru's face as he swelled with crimson energy, ready to fire his blast.

"You seek to clash your energies with mine own? Thou art a fool!" Kuno cried out triumphantly.

"YOU'RE THE FOOL!" Noboru shouted. _**"MAKA ZENAKU!!!"**_

Kuno prepared to deflect the blast and fire his own counter, knowing that the beast would be defenseless. And when the blast zoomed right past him, he knew that he had won. But curiously, Noboru was still smiling after he missed. This confused Kuno at first, until he realized something: the blast was not meant for him!

Did you know that when you're about to die, your life doesn't actually pass before your eyes? You don't have time. At that exact moment, only one thing goes through your mind. Your mind has time to process one last thought.

At that exact moment in time, one word flashed through Akane's mind…

_'Baka…'_

She died the way she lived…

At least that's what she believed was going to happen as she closed her eyes in fear.

But when she opened her eyes, she saw that the blast had not even singed her. And standing in front of her was a very bloody, very battle-weary Tatewaki Kuno.

"Clever plan… foul beast…" he grunted. And at that, he fell to the ground.

"KUNO!" Akane shouted, dropping to her knees.

She grabbed his body and flipped him over, holding him in her arms. "Kuno!" she shouted, shaking him violently. "Don't die you dummy! Don't die!"

The swordsman opened his eyes and found himself greeted with a vision of beauty. "Ah…" he said, as a sad smile crept across his face. "A beautiful angel has come to ferry me away to the next world. With this I can rest easy, as I know that the kami above would not have found me worthy enough had I failed something so simple as rescuing their most beloved Akane Tendo. Knowing this, I may only ask that she remember me in her heart with fondness, and only feel joy with she thinks of the day that a foolish samurai stepped between her and the wrath of a demon…"

And so, Kuno closed his eyes, allowing his body to go limp and the sweet embrace of death to relieve him of his pain. Tears fell on his face as Akane shouted his name, knowing that someone she'd absolutely hated had just given his life for her, wishing she could tell him how grateful she was and how sorry she was.

This was the death of one of the mightiest samurai ever known: A man whose very name struck fear within those of the kendo world. He was a modern day samurai, who became known as "The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High", because of his skill with the sword.

He was Tatewaki Kuno… aged 19…

________________________________________________________________________

**I bet you weren't expecting that, were you? Kuno stepping into the spotlight as more than just comic effect, as well as being downright heroic. Well, as you probably know if you read my other Ranma story "I love you Dad", I adore taking characters who are one-dimensional and making them at least slightly more complex, or portraying them in a new light. This was my way of doing it with Kuno. I've never really seen him as a villain. In my book, he's actually a nice, good person, but he's so extraordinarily delusional that he finds himself propelled to do evil things, because he thinks they're right.**

**NEXT TIME! Akane is left all alone to face the vicious Noboru! How will she survive? Plus, the true reason behind Noboru's hatred of Ranma is revealed! You don't wanna miss this!**

**Oh noes! North Korea and that crazy old lady in charge of it have decided to launch nuclear missiles at your house, rather than the usual ocean they fire them at. But hark! A button that says review! Click it and use the power of what you thought of this chapter to make a happy sunshine shield to protect you from the crazy old lady.**


	8. Noboru's True Motivations!

**Chapter 8: Noboru's True Motivations!**

**As thanks for everyone being so patient, two chapters for the price of one!**

Akane was no stranger to danger. She'd been kidnapped by so many crazies who wanted to marry her or use her against Ranma, she basically spent more time in a cell than in her own bedroom. But she'd never been frightened like this. Noboru had just killed Kuno, and incapacitated every member of the NWC. And now he was walking over to her, with a deathly killing intent in his eyes.

"Little girl… You and your friends have caused me so much aggravation and humiliation… I am going to snap your neck in two… like a tooth-pick…" the demon King growled.

He reached out and grabbed Akane by the throat, squeezing the life out of her. She kicked and screamed frantically, trying to get away as the demon lifted her off the ground with one hand.

As Akane felt the life being literally squeezed out of her, Noboru was suddenly forced to let go as a foot collided with his face, knocking him into, and implanting him in, the door of a car.

"That's what you get for touching my fiancée…"

Standing in front of her was the one, the only: Ranma Saotome.

"Ranma!" she shouted, coming up to hug him. Unfortunately, he had disappeared in an instant and she'd landed flat on her face.

"Don't read anything into this…" He muttered from behind her. "I have absolutely no intention of fighting ever again after this… This is the last time I'm saving your stupid ass…"

Once again, Ranma fell victim to chronic "Foot-in-mouth" disease as a mallet slammed into his cranium.

"RANMA YOU JERK!!!"

"Hate you too, bitch…"

As Noboru climbed out of the car, he clutched his head in pain. This was the first time a mortal had managed to strike him with enough force to actually injure him. Only one man had this kind of power.

"Ranma Saotome…" he sneered.

"Noboru, King of Demons, I heard you were looking for me…" Ranma replied.

"I've been hunting you ever since I arrived in the world of the mortals. I swear I'll pay you back for what you did to me!!!"

"Did you make an appointment?"

"Wh-What?"

"All you had to do was call 1-800-I-want-to-kill-ranma and make an appointment with our user-friendly customer support…"

"You… dare to make jokes… AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO ME!?!"

"Come to think of it, what did I do to you?"

"As if you don't know… Ranma… you killed the woman I loved!!!"

Everyone who had not yet lost consciousness gasped in shock. Ranma killed somebody? It was unthinkable.

"I did what?"

"You killed the woman I loved!!!"

"I never killed anyone!"

"Oh, but you did Ranma, Let me tell you a story. The life of a demon, even a demon king, is one of misery and despair. But in my sorrow, I had one comfort: a beautiful woman here in the mortal world. I saw her one day as I was passing through China… She was… so beautiful and graceful… I was immediately in love with her. From then on, I followed her all through her travels, the whole time she was unaware of my presence."

"So you were a stalker?"

"No! I was in love!"

"So was Masahiko Shizawa*"

"Shut up! You killed the woman I loved!"

"Alright, already. God! So what did I do to this woman?"

"I told you… You killed her… One day, I decided that I would go up to her and confess my love to her! But just before I could, she, thinking I worked at the restaurant she was eating at, asked me for a kettle of hot water…"

"You don't mean…"

"She poured the water over herself… and turned into a man…"

The awkward silence was broken only by the sound of the wind blowing."

"Let me get this straight…" Ranma growled, "You're trying to kill me… because you stalked me… and I turned out to be A GUY!?!"

"I have seen Hell!"

"You're a pervert!!!"

"DIE RANMA SAOTOME!!!"

Noboru launched himself, kicking at Ranma's head. With his superior speed, Ranma leapt into the air, dodging, and kicked at Noboru's head. Noboru was sent spinning through the air. As he landed, he plunged his claws into the ground and picked up a huge chunk, flinging it at Ranma. The pig-tailed martial artist then threw out his fist and smashed the boulder like a wooden board. Through the dust, however, he was unable to see Noboru, until the demon king slammed his fist into our hero's gut.

Ranma quickly leapt into the air, flipping away from Noboru, who was hot on his trail. In the air, Noboru was faster than Ranma and was easily able to catch up and slice at him with his claws. They bored into the martial artist's chest, cutting him deeply. The demon king then kicked Ranma in the gut, grabbed his shirt, and slammed him into the ground.

Noboru rushed to continue punishing Ranma, preparing to slam his claws right into Ranma's neck. Just as he reached Ranma's unmoving body, however, his claws penetrated only the ground, Ranma having disappeared.

Feeling a surge of energy, Noboru looked up to find Ranma seemingly floating in the sky, with his hands encompassing a massive amount of energy.

_**"MOKO TAKEBISHA!!!"**_

The demon summoned his chi to protect himself from the blast. Unfortunately for him, he'd closed his eyes in fear, and had not seen Ranma's true actions.

Ranma fired his blast into the sky, propelling him towards Noboru at lightning speed! Noboru's barrier may have protected against chi attacks, but they were useless against physical assaults. As Ranma neared the demon king, he shouted at the top of his lungs, _**"KATSU TENSHIN AMEGURIKEN!!!"**_

His fists pounded into Noboru like a hammer into cheap, flimsy nails. In just two seconds, he managed to punch the demon an astounding 583 times. "There, now don't bother me anymore," he said coldly. "I'm trying to enjoy my retirement…"

In a second, Noboru shot up from the ground and fired an energy blast into Ranma's chest at point-blank range.

"RANMA!" Akane screamed in horror, as her fiancée tumbled across the ground like a rag doll.

_'Damn it! He got me!' _Ranma thought as he tried to stop rolling. _'The wound's deep. I've already lost too much blood from when he cut me. I have to end this soon… There's only one thing I can do. I sure hope this works… even though it like… never does…'_

As Ranma picked himself up off the ground, he inhaled and exhaled, trying desperately to calm himself down. If this was going to work, he'd need to be as cool and collected as possible.

"Have you made your peace with the gods Saotome?" Noboru asked mockingly as he walked towards Ranma.

Ranma smiled defiantly. "If there's one thing I can't do, it's make peace with people…"

The demon king's cocky grin faded into an angry scowl. "JUST DIE ALREADY!" he shouted, slamming his fist into Ranma's face. Ranma was knocked back by the impact… though it seemed like was knocked a bit too far back considering the blow… and in something of an odd direction.

Blinded by rage, Noboru failed to notice this strange incident over and over, as he pounded into Saotome's face again and again. Ranma, too weak to hold up his arms and block, was forced to take each blow head on. _'Just a bit more!'_ he thought as a particularly powerful shot connected with his gut.

_'NOW!'_ he thought. He tried to unleash the attack he'd been preparing, but was once again too slow as Noboru brought his fist down into Ranma's face, smashing him into the ground.

_'Damn it! I lost a lot of the built up energy there… I hope that what I've got left is enough to finish this…_

As Noboru gathered energy in his hands, he stood over Ranma, ready to blast him. "Any last words, Saotome?" He asked menacingly.

Ranma's cocky grin spread across his face as he said, "Just four…"

With all of the strength he could muster, Ranma made a fist and pointed it directly at the demon king's face.

"_**Hiryu Shoten Ha… Bitch…"**_

**ULTIMATE CLIFFHANGER! 2000 GAMERSCORE!!!**

**This is not the end of the story, I feel I should say. It was originally going to be, but a review I got from a mister "O'Donoghue" gave me a lot of ideas on how to improve the story, some of which I could only implement by cutting out everything between this and the last chapter, shortening this chapter, and then writing more content after it. The story will probably be a bit longer than I meant for it, but not much. I think this chapter was better in my original vision for it, but doing this to it is going to make the story itself better overall. In fact, in retrospect, the ending I had in mind pretty much sucked. So praise O'Donoghue. He saved this story.**

**Next time, the aftermath of the battle with Noboru. Friends adapt to the new Ranma. Ranma finds his promise of pacifism to be harder to keep than he thought. And all the while, one thought lingers within all our heroes' thoughts: college… But at least they're free of Noboru… Or ARE they!?! Find out! Next time!**

*** Masahiko Shizawa was a Japanese national who stalked Brittney Spears before being deported for stalking Brittney Spears. He then sued Brittney Spears for having him deported.**

**OH NOES!!! …Um… Uh… Hmm… Review my story…**


	9. OMAKE!

**First, I'd like to apologize for the lack of updates. School has kept me very busy lately. I don't plan on taking a huge hiatus like before, but what happens will happen. A new chapter will be out soon, which is when I'll explain, in greater detail, why updates are taking so long.**

**Right, well, this was originally supposed to be part of chapter 7, but it came out really stupid, so it was cut. It was, however, pretty funny, so I've included it as an Omake.**

**Please note that this was written before I decided to change the story significantly, so it will contradict the story at several points. This is not meant to be taken seriously in the least. It is one gigantic farce.**

**Omake: Ranma and Ranko**

Fighting. Training. Akane. It didn't matter anymore. At this point, Ranma had given up hope that he'd ever be able to find happiness again. He truly had gone full emo… He couldn't even find a reason to fight anymore, and he'd driven away his only friends. What was the point of trying to fix it? Maybe he should just go away somewhere. Maybe he could find somewhere new to live.

That was it. All his life he'd traveled from one place to another. All these problems were just the product of staying in one spot for too long. He'd pack up his bags and find a new life in a new place, where Ranma Saotome wasn't needed, just welcome. A place without fighting, or martial arts, or fiancées.

Ranma ran to his room, with more passion than he'd had in a while. He had a plan now. First, hop a train to Hokkaido. Then he'd stow away on board a plane to some western country. Once he was there, he'd open a small business selling hair care products. After all, no matter who you are, you need Shampoo…

…

Okay, new plan. Hokkaido. Plane. Open up a quaint little bistro. He'd sell Sandwiches. With all the works. Lettuce. Cheese. Ham…

…

Okay, forget the ham. No pig-related products in his bistro! If you want meat, you'll need some kind of fowl, like chicken or turkey or possibly duck…

…

Okay, forget the bistro. He'd sell pizza. After all, it's just American Okonomiyaki…

…

Oh for Kami's sake! You know what? He'd be homeless! Just wandering the country. Yeah! And he'd make a few coins telling the foreigners stories about Japan, with its hot springs, and electronics, and Samurai…

…

Damn it! You know what? He was just going to dig a hole, crawl in it, and not talk to anyone ever!

"You, my friend, are really starting to lose it…"

"Wha-?" Ranma gasped, shocked to hear the mysterious voice. Turning to the source, Ranma was shocked to see… Ranma… or, more specifically, Ranko.

"Hi Ranma! Wow, the two of us haven't talked in a while, huh?" she blurted out, giggling like a bubbly little idiot.

"Um… Who are you? And why do you look like me?" he asked. A normal person would be shocked, but quite frankly, weirder things had happened to him.

"I am you silly!" she answered.

"But I'm me…" he replied, a bit unintelligently…

"I'm your feminine side!"

"Oh, I don't have one of those. Pops beat it out of me when I was 6. I think you're looking for Ryoga… the pansy…"

"Oh, you didn't lose me silly. You just repressed me deep into the deepest, darkest, coldest nether-regions of your soul…"

"I don't understand…"

"That's because you're an idiot…"

"I resent that!"

"Just like Akane resents you calling her uncute, and how Ryoga resents you knocking him into a cursed spring, and Mousse resents you stealing his woman, and Shampoo and Ukyo resent you leading them on, and…"

"Okay, that's enough! And I don't lead Shampoo and Ukyo on!"

"No, you just love Akane, but don't sit them down and tell them it's not gonna happen, so thanks to your cowardice, they keep going on thinking they have a shot, which you know will only make it hurt worse when you finally tell them that they've wasted two years of their lives chasing after a single guy. Seriously, they're supposed to be your friends! As far as trying to let them down goes, you've been more cruel to them than you've been to the Kuno's."

"You know what? This is pointless, because you're not real! You're just a fig tree of my imagination!"

"Figment Ranma… Figment…"

"I can't hear you, because you don't exist!"

"If you'd just admitted I existed, I wouldn't exist."

"What?"

"Ranma, have you ever noticed how Jusenkyo curses seem to be custom made for the person who receives them? Your dad is fat and lazy, so he turns into a panda. Mousse is a dork, trying to be cool, so he turns into a duck, which everyone knows wants to be a swan1. Shampoo is cute, yet devious, so she turns into a scheming little cat. Ryoga's starved for affection, so he turns into a cute, loveable piglet."

"What about Pantyhose Taro?"

"Well… That one was actually just a random accident… But the point is, Jusenkyo is magic in more ways than one. When you're fated to fall in a spring, and it is fate, your cursed form is something of a window into your soul. So, Ranma, since you repress all your feelings, you fell into the spring of drowned girl, since girls love to talk about their feelings."

"So, the reason I can see you now is… I've gone crazy…"

"No, this has nothing to do with the fact that you've gone crazy. As it turns out, you've been repressing so much lately that you're liable to get a brain tumor…"

"A what?"

"A brain tumor… So, your subconscious mind has created cute little me."

"And you're supposed to do what, exactly?"

"Get you to stop being a douchebag."

"Excuse me?"

"Ranma, you are an idiot…"

"So I've been told…"

"And because of that, you do stupid things. You say things without actually thinking. You piss people off. You make enemies with nearly everyone you meet."

"That's not true!"

"You do not have one single friend that has not tried to kill you in the past. You start fights over the most pointless stuff, and get your ass kicked."

"Hey!"

"And now you do this. You decide to become a pacifist, because you think that all of your problems are caused by fighting. But they're not Ranma… They're caused by your father…"

"My father?"

"Yeah! Your father's the one who engaged you to all those women, got you cursed at Jusenkyo, wouldn't let you see your mom most of your life, and threw you into a pit of cats with fish-sausages around your neck. I think the solution's pretty obvious…"

"It is…?"

"Yes, you need to kill your father…"

"… I do…?"

"Yes, but first, you need to save your friends."

"What's the point?"

"The point is to not be an asshole! Your friends are risking their lives for you right now, you ungrateful bastard!!! Do you have any idea how miserable you'd be without Ryoga and Mousse and Shampoo and Ukyo and Akane… and I guess Kuno…?"

"Look, this is really starting to make me uncomfortable, so I'm just gonna go dig that hole…"

Ranko began slapping Ranma across the face repeatedly, "WHY ARE YOU SO THICK!?!"

"What'd you do that for!?!"

"Why are you so determined to drive everyone away from you!?!"

"I don't have to deal with this…"

"Yes you do damn it! People care about you Ranma! And you care about them! But you're so damn stubborn that you can't admit you were wrong and man up! Stop being a coward and deal with your troubles!"

"You're a fig tree of my imagination!"

"IT'S FIGMENT YOU LITTLE DUMB-ASS!!!"

"Why do you even care what I do?"

"Brain tumor, stupid! Brain tumor!"

"Look! If I go fight the demon, will you shut up and leave me alone!?!"

"For now…"

"Fine! See you later!"

"Sure thing!" Ranko chuckled, returning to her girly ways. "And don't forget what I told you about your father!"

With that, Ranko faded back into Ranma's subconscious, as the martial arts legend walked off towards one last battle.

**Well, it is what it is… Tell me what you thought.**


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